Shabbat Shalom

The challah in the oven envelops the house with its smell.  The house is clean, the sun is setting.  It is time for Shabbat.  The girls come out of their room in their fancy dresses and we pick out our head coverings for the evening. 

They unknowingly invoke our families as we cover our heads.  E loves the kippah I wore for my bat mitzvah, a beautiful beaded and wire art piece bought for me by my grandmother.  S’s black and rhinestone hat looks like it was from the forties, a gift to me from Kate’s grandmother.  My own head covering is a headband; Ima Kate’s is her typical kippah.

As guests arrive – we try to always have guests for Shabbat – I take the food off the stove and we get ready for Shabbat to begin.  We gather, exhale, and begin to light the candles.  I wave in the Shabbat flame and close my eyes.  Each word brings me a step farther from my week, a step closer to the magic of Shabbat.  I open my eyes and find that Shabbat’s song has brought me my heart’s desires, a family and community to celebrate these moments.

We place our hands upon our children’s heads as we bless them. 

May G-d bless you as G-d blessed Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel, and Leah. May G-d bless you and keep you.May G-d cause G-d’s spirit to shine upon you
and be gracious unto you.May G-d turn G-d’s spirit unto you and grant you peace.

We say it in English so they can understand our blessing.  The first time I placed my hand upon their heads, my tears came before I got to the second line.  I silently say these words to myself in shul during the silent Amidah.  They’re meaningful to me, and its an overwhelming privilege to share these old blessings with my own children.

For most of my life I have been preparing for these moments.  Growing up, every Friday we shared a beautiful Shabbat meal.  The fancy china and wine glasses were gently carried from the cabinet and placed lovingly on the tablecloth.  The lights were dimmed and candles lit, often with explanations to our friends and family who joined our table. 

After lighting the candles, I open my eyes to this new Shabbat day.  Little hands that rolled matzo balls and kneaded challah now giggle as we place our loving hands upon them.  Soon, we’ll teach them Shabbat songs and games, then the aleph bet, then their Torah parsha, then…  There is so much to teach.

Instilling in them a love of Shabbat and a love of one another brings me great joy and pride as a parent.  The learning moments are accumulating so fast.  They have been with us for three weeks, and already it feels like we’re a real family, I’m a real parent.  At night, we say the shema together, and they are beginning to learn the Hebrew alphabet and food blessings.  They feel comfortable with us, to yell at us and love us, ask us questions and pretend they know the answers.  Homework struggles continue, but their joy of reading is boundless.  They’re great kids, ready to tackle the work of the world… tomorrow, because tonight is Shabbat.