Thanksgiving

Kate and I are still in the honeymoon period with the girls, but already we can tell we got really lucky. We don’t know why we get to have the luck – to find one another, to find these perfect-for-us kids – but I can’t imagine a better life for myself.

We brought the girls to Thanksgiving at Aunt Annie’s house. As Robb family gatherings go, it was a small one with only 15 people, and a great introduction to Robb family love. Everyone was thrilled to meet E & S. It was just about as perfect as I could have imagined. The girls ran around the house, playing with each other, with us, and with family. There was lots of love, laughs, and compliments. S fell in love with cousin Ellen, both E & S loved staying at Aunt Jane and Uncle Jim’s cabin, and they giggled madly around “The Man Who Built The House” (Uncle Michel). Uncle Jim said we looked like a beautiful family, a huge compliment from a man of few words on subjects like family, love, and emotions. Grandmas Chris and C.C. were head over heels in love with the little munchkins, and it’s easy to see why. They’re amazing children.

Thanksgiving was a beautiful event, but it was the day after that really cemented my love of this family and our girls:

Cousin Max supervised the girls’ little hands as they chopped mushrooms and cilantro for breakfast. He entertained them with stories of his own youth, and the table was full of giggles.

The family went shopping in a local town. The girls were exhausted by days of festivities, and one was particularly moody. I asked if she wanted a piggyback ride, and the rest of the afternoon was spent with an awesome child on my back. “Keep hands and feet inside the ride at all times” I yelled as I jumped, hopped, twirled, and ran through the free sidewalks, a giggling appendage behind me.

On the drive home from Thanksgiving, our car vibrated with children’s songs, our voices coming together in laughter and love. An hour later, there were two exhausted children in the back seat, asleep. 

These moments, I late told Kate, feel like heaven. I cannot imagine a better life.

I love being able to share beautiful moments with you, but there have been hard moments too. An exhausted child ran off farther than I liked and didn’t come back when I called. Conversations about placement followed by “I really wish I could see my mom.” A two hour drive punctuated by “Are we close yet?” literally every minute, on the minute, as the clock turns.

But even these hard moments are deeply wonderful. Being present for these children is the most important thing I can do with my life right now, and I feel so grateful I can do it.

It’s hard sometimes to share these moments with you, my blog readers. People who don’t know us or S & E have more critical things to say to us. It’s overwhelming putting myself out there – keeping this blog, asking questions, being emotionally vulnerable. All the quotes are things that have been said to us:

“I have seen many placements fall apart in the first 6 months so I’d be careful about promises until things are settled.”

“Also this might sound cruel, but…” (it was cruel and it was unnecessary)

“It is CRITICAL to …” (opinion)

“Don’t let family overwhelm them with STUFF (you’ll know better, right?)”

“Don’t you think it would be better if…”

“Won’t they be sad when you take away Christmas?” (for those of you wondering – we won’t. Christmas will be celebrated at friends and family’s homes.)

“Have you even thought about [subject we were just discussing]?!”

These things irk me, of course, but only because Kate and I have spent so much time thinking about this placement, reading adoption books, and trying our best to prepare to be parents to two amazing girls.

I keep this blog in hopes that I can help others who are thinking about adoption and to keep our friends and family in the loop during this (overwhelming) process. In person responses have been mostly positive, and it’s a testament to you – our amazing family and friends – that we can even do this right now.

There’s so much to tell you all, but so little too. We’ve fallen deeply in love with these girls, and – really – that’s all that matters.